5:00

5:00.

My work day is 9:00-5:00. With no lunch break. Not having lunch is probably for the best. Although it would be nice to get out of the office for an hour; it takes twice as much time to navigate this part of town because of all the tourists wandering around trying to find ground zero, I try to avoid tourists as much as possible. Also if I left during my lunch break, I might not come back. That would definitely put a blemish on my perfect attendance record.

Anyway staring at the computer, or the wall, all day makes me really excited for 5:00. The problem is I don't want my bosses to know how excited 5:00 makes me. I think they think I like my job. Not quite sure how they got that impression, but I'm gonna try and let that ride as long as possible. The first minute past 5:00pm eastern standard time is probably my most favorite minute of the whole entire day. It is my favorite because not only is my work day over, but technically if I am still in the office I'm putting in overtime. Not the kind of overtime that you get paid for, non-profits don't do that. But the kind of overtime that you do to make you feel better about those days when you leave before 5:00. It's like if you put in a little overtime it makes it ok that you spent the entire day internet shopping and playing scrabble on Facebook. But throw all that feeling better crap out for a second, whether or not the job is done, your boss can't say shit, its 5:00 and you put your time in. Plus she probably has not idea that you haven't been working all day anyway.

As excited as I am for 5:00, I do my best not to be the first person to leave the office. It's really hard. Like really really hard. 5:00 is pretty much all I have to look forward to during the day so it's hard not to sprint out the door. I'm not sure how these other people manage to stay late everyday. That’s real dedication, or perhaps it is just because they don't ever actually show up to work on time so they are making it up on the back end. Hmmm.

I realized this morning that not only do I leave everyday at 5:01, but I have been the first one out of the office every day for about the last 3 months, I'm worried someone might start calling my dedication into question. Especially since we are approaching the busiest time of the year. Can't be seen slacking off in October. (Please note I didn't say you can't slack off, I said you can't be SEEN slacking off). Once it is 5:00pm it takes all of my will power to stay longer. I try to bide my time by cleaning my work space, filling up my water bottle, going to the bathroom multiple times. But that seems to only get me to 5:04. So I check Facebook AGAIN to see if anything has changed. Nope, I still look gorgeous in all my pics. Now what? I guess I could do work. Lord knows that there is plenty of that around here. But honestly I haven't felt like working all that much in say the last year or so. Maybe tomorrow. 5:06.

It isn't like I even have any place to go. I just don't want to be here anymore. I try to tie up a few loose ends but alas it is only 5:08 and no one else has even made a move to the door, although my eyes are fixated on it. I was actually quite productive today. Let's just forget for a moment all the unnoticeable things I am NOT doing throughout the day, and talk about the noticeable things I HAVE done. I just have to complete a few noticeable tasks so the powers that be don't ever have to question what it is I have been doing all day. A few frustrated groans, an annoyed look, and a mass email are pretty much all they need to see to be convinced I'm working hard.

OH GOD these last minutes are going by sooooo sloooowlllly. 5:11. Now I'm just annoyed. I should just leave. I stayed a whole 11 minutes past when I was supposed to stay. I mean I could stay longer, I just don't feel like working any more. Well, it's more like I don't feel like not working at work anymore. I pretty much call it a day around 3pm anyway so why not leave? I don't understand why these people are still in the office. I just wish I wasn't always the first to leave. I accomplish so little all day that I feel like I owe it to myself to at least complete the personal goals I set for myself. Goals like..not rolling my eyes, smiling at people when they ask me to do stupid shit, and of course, not being the first one out the door.

Fuck it...I'm leaving. 5:13